Dear Reader,
Last week, I told you about the anger stored in my liver, how it was a shield protecting me from feeling love, because love had hurt me before. It was guarding me against the fear of getting hurt again if I opened my heart.
This week, I want to show you how to free yourself from any emotion and understand its true nature.
In the Tibetan tradition of ChĂśd (ŕ˝ŕ˝
ཟŕ˝), the founder Machig LabdrĂśn refers to these defense mechanisms as Demons.
These demons arenât necessarily like the monsters portrayed in Hollywood Films, ghosts waiting in the dark to haunt you.
A demon is simply âanything which hinders liberationâ or blocks your inner peace.
This could be triggered by the external world (illnesses, fears, addictions, relationships, family dynamics) or rise from your inner world (grief, anger, anxiety, shame, depression).
These demons arenât our enemies. They are external projections creted by the ego to protect us. They exist to keep us safe, so we donât have to face what lies behind our worst fears.
In neuroscientific terms, these âdemonsâ are unconscious neural pathways. They are the amygdalaâs way of keeping us safe from vulnerabilities and traumas weâve experienced in the past.
For instance, for a long time, I had an Alcohol Demon.
It wasnât extreme, but occasionally, I would order a bottle of white wine to drink by myself after a long week of work. I didnât know why I wanted it; it was just an automatic behavior that helped me wind down.
In reality, that alcohol demon was guarding against my fear of sitting alone with my feelings. It was protecting me from regressing to the wounded child who had learned that emotions are overwhelming and need to be repressed. It was numbing me so I never needed to feel the sense of emptiness that was unconsciously devouring me from the inside.
By facing the fear that the Alcohol was guarding me against, I finally stopped wanting to drink. By learning how to sit with my difficult feelings, I no longer needed to numb them.
Demons manifest as our worst fears. We are evolutionarily wired to avoid what we fear, but the more we avoid our demons, the stronger they have control over us. They prey on our fears.
By pushing these parts of ourselves into the shadows, they move into the driverâs seat of our unconscious. They start making decisions for us without us even realizing who is at the wheel.
Most of our decisions are emotionally driven, not logically driven. They are driven by fear, the avoidance of our inner demons.
So, how do we free our demons?
We donât fight them. We feed them.
By identifying the demons of your mind and giving them exactly what they need, whether itâs love, safety, recognition, or love, they lose their power over you.
You discover that they are illusionary constructs of your ego, built only to protect you.
This is the practice of ChĂśd: feeding the demons to cut through the ego.
You donât need to have significant trauma to have inner demons. They can be everyday fears, patterns, addictions that are preventing you from reaching your next goal.
While the original ChĂśd is a lineage practice taught by Tibetan masters, Iâve designed this version based on my own experience with shamanism, Internal Family Systems (IFS), the work of Gabrielle Roth (5Rhythms) and YaâAcov Darling Khan (Movement Medicine).
Here is how I use it to face my demons.
STEP 1. LIST YOUR PATTERNS AND FEARS
Choose one area of your life that you want to improve or even an an aspect of that area in your life (E.g. career, business, relationships, marketing, public speaking, etc. ). List the patterns and fears that keep showing up when you try to move toward your goal.
For instance, my goal is to finish a book.
Patterns getting in my way:
- Procrastination
- Perfectionism
- Sudden creative highs followed by resistance to finishing
- Changing outlines again and again
- Productivity highs and lows (swinging between burnout and discipline)
My Fears:
- Fear of my writing not being good enough
- Fear of working too hard and burnout
- Fear of losing my creative freedom
- Fear of failure and being criticized
STEP 2: IDENTIFY YOUR DEMONS
For each fear, identify which part of you is driving it. It might be a past version of you or just an emotion. Personify it by giving it a name, a movie character, a color, or a shape, whatever comes naturally.
(I recommend starting with self-reflection, but if you really struggle to identify them, you can input your list from Step 1 into AI and ask it to help identify the demon archetypes for you.)
The Mapping:
- Procrastination & Perfectionism & Revising the outlines again and again & Fear of my writing not being good enough â The Perfectionist
- Creative Highs & Resistance & Fear of losing my creative freedom â The Wild Artist
- Fear of Burnout â The Exhausted Survivor
- Fear of Failure â The Wounded Child
- Fear of Criticism â The Perfectionist/The Inner Critic
STEP 3. FIND THE MUSIC
Create a playlist (10 minutes minimum) for one specific inner demon. Pick 3 to 4 songs that embody that demonâs voice.
Spend time finding the right songs. Some people find abstract songs without lyrics help them embody the voice; others need lyrics to tap into the feeling. Trust your gut. When you hear it, youâll feel it.
(If you are new to this, just pick one demon to start.)
Hereâs the playlist used by the practitioner at the anger workshop I attended (you can use it if Anger is your demon):
Here are my playlists for my specific demons (Feel free to use them for reference):
The Perfectionist
The Wild Artist
The Exhausted Survivor
The Wounded Child
STEP 4. EMBODY THE INNER DEMON (The Dance)
This practice helps you embody the demon so you can understand what it is trying to protect you from.
Find a private space where you can move freely without judgment. Dim the lights. Give yourself 20â30 minutes if you are only working with 1 demon or 1-2 hours if you are working with multiple demons.
If movement feels unfamiliar, you don't need to "dance" in any formal sense. Simply stand and close your eyes, allow the music to guide your body to sway gently.
PART 1. The Embodiment
Start from the center of the space youâve chosen. Ground yourself. Take 3 deep breaths.
Physically assign a space around you for the demon.
Play the playlist and step into that space. Become the demon. If it is the Inner Critic, act as if you are the Critic. Let any memories or emotions emerge without censoring them. Your unconscious knows what you need; surrender and let it move you.
When the song ends, pause. Notice how your body feels. Ask yourself these three questions (answering in the first person as the demon) before stepping out:
- âWhat I want from you isâŚâ
- âWhat I need from you isâŚâ
- âWhen my need is met, I will feelâŚâ
Let the answers come through your body, through sensation, emotion, or movement.
Example: My Anger demon says: âWhat I want is expression. What I need is attention and recognition of the hurt the inner child suffered. When my need is met, I will feel peaceful.â
Step out of the demonâs space and move back to the center.
PART 2. Feed the Demon
As you come back to the center, take 3 deep breaths and ground into your body. Turn and face the space where you just embodied the demon.
Visualize giving the demon exactly what it said it needed in Part 1.
If it said âWhen my need is met, I will feel peaceful,â visualize sending waves of peace to the demon. If you find it hard to visualize that emotion, think of a few memories when you felt that specific feeling, and send those memories to the demon.
As you feed the demon these emotions, watch closely: Does the demonâs image change? Does it soften? Does it transform?
(It might feel weird if youâve never done active imagination work before. Donât overthink it. Imagine you are a movie director crafting a dream scene.)
Step 5. The Final Dance
Once youâve met the demons, create a final integration dance in the center.
Play a few songs that feel expansive: something that holds space for all of you. As you move, invite your inner demons to dance with you. Recognize that there is no separation between âSelfâ and âDemon.â You are the awareness that holds them all.
When you dance from your wholeness, that is freedom.
Step 6. Journal
While the experience is still alive in your body, write down the embodied wisdom youâve gathered.
For each inner demon, capture what it felt like in your body, what it revealed to you, what it is protecting you from, and how you can honor it without letting it control you.
What to Expect:
- The first time will feel awkward. Do it anyway.
- Some demons will be hard to embody. Those are usually the ones you need to meet the most. Emotions will surface: crying, shaking, laughing. They are all normal. Let them move through without judgment.
- You might resist certain songs. That is your ego protecting you. Push through.
- After a few rounds, youâll start to recognize the demons immediately, not just in the dance but in daily life. When the Critic speaks, youâll know. When the Child is triggered, youâll feel it. And youâll finally have the space to choose how to respond.
A CRITICAL NOTE ON SAFETY
The unconscious is powerful. This practice is designed to bring up intense emotions, and that isnât safe for every season of life.
Please do not try this practice alone if you are currently in crisis, feeling unsafe, or navigating deep trauma history (PTSD) without professional support.
If you have a history of dissociation, psychosis, or severe anxiety, or if you are currently recovering from addiction, this practice can be destabilising. The same applies to physical conditions like epilepsy or heart issues: intense somatic work moves a lot of energy.
Respect your nervous system. If you arenât sure, sit this one out or take these instructions to a therapist who can hold the space for you.
Happy Winter Solstice! (It is the perfect time for this shadow work as we welcome the Light tomorrow.)
If you give this a try, Iâd love to hear how it goes for you.
Much love and have a festive season,
Ginny
